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Chapter 494 "I know you feel like a prisoner, still," Damien said. "But I am doing my best, Amelia. And I have agreed to train you." I knew he only wanted our fight to be over, to go back to the way things used to be. He was great at glossing over everything - just like how he had neglected to tell me everything that had happened in the past six years. "You've agreed, but we haven't started yet. And it's not like that makes everything else disappear, Damien. There's a lot that I can't just " The door opened and the girls reappeared, each holding a glass of lemonade.
I immediately bit my tongue, unwilling to fight in front of them. "We're forgetting something..." Amy said, after they gave us the drinks and we thanked them for it. "Salads!" Stacy said. "That's right," Amy said. The girls scurried back into the house. When the door closed behind them, I took a deep breath. "I know that I hurt you, Amelia," Damien said, his voice low and earnest. "But I hope you can see I am trying to fix it." "I can," I admitted. "But this kind of hurt... The lies, Damien.
I don't know if I can recover from it." "What are you saying?" he asked, his eyes going a little wide, the rest of his face falling. "You are a great father, and a good provider. But a marriage should be a partnership, and you have failed me on that front," I said. Softer, I said, "I don't know what to do about that..." Just then, the girls reappeared with the salads. Damien and I both put on happier faces. The girls stood nearby, watching as we ate, so we had to keep up the friendly ruse. In front of them, we kept our conversation polite. "Nice weather we are having," Damien said.
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"Very pleasant," I said. After the salad, they took our plates and went to get the dinner. In the few minutes they were gone, Damien and I were both silent. I didn't know what else to say, and he was likely processing. When we had finished with dinner, Amy grabbed the radio she must have hidden nearby before all this started. "What is a dinner without a dance?" she asked, and turned on the radio. What played was a slow song, something that would require a slow dance. Damien would have to hold me, and we would hold hands. He'd lead me, with each small step bringing us closer together.
Our faces would be near... Would we whisper soft words? Would we stare into each other's eyes? Would he lean down to kiss me? 1/2 Damien stood from the table, came to my side and offered me his hand. "May I have this dance?" I didn't want to disappoint the girls, who were watching so eagerly. Until now, we hadn't been lying to them, just keeping hidden our fighting. We would always be a family, with Damien and me both being there for our kids, even if we weren't doing it as a couple ourselves. Dinner was one thing, but to slow dance in front of the girls...
Wouldn't that give them false hope that Damien and I were doing better than we were? The dance would feel like a lie. I looked at Damien's hand, then up at him. I swallowed hard. Tears welled in my eyes. Gods, I didn't want to disappoint my daughters, but I was overwhelmed. This was too much, too far, and I couldn't do it. "I'm sorry," I said to Damien. "I'm sorry," I said to the girls. Then I stood and wiping the wet from my eyes, rushed into the house before they could see me cry. 2/2 Joseph King
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