138 LYRIC LunaIsoldewasright.
JarisandIcouldneverbe athing.
Icouldntputanametowhatwehadbetweenusofrecent,butIwassureitcouldnevergobeyondthis.Wecouldneverhaverealfeelingsforeachother.
AsIshutthedoorafterhisdeparture,Islidtothefloorandwept.
Ithurtthatmaybe;justmaybemylifewouldvebeendifferentifIwasntthis, Perhaps,IdhavebeenabletoaccompanyhimtotheCapitalandevengettoknowwhattheproblemwas.
Idhavekepthimcompanywhilehenavigatedwhateverchallengeshewasgoingtodealwith.
Maybewewouldvecrackedajokeortwoandsharedalaugh.
Maybe,justmaybe,wedhaveevenheldhandsatsomepoint.
Butnoneofitcouldbereal.
Iwasadangerousforbiddenthing;amurderer.
Ineededtobefarfromhimand everyoneelse.
IwipedmyfaceasIgotonmyfeet.
Myhandbagwasalreadyset.Sincetheplacewasstillfullandbusy,Ididntwanttoriskmovingaroundwithluggagestoavoiddrawingattention.So,Ionlytookmyessentialsandfittedthemintomybighandbag.

AwhilelaterandIwasoutofmyroom.IwassureJarismustveleft already.
Icouldntevensaygoodbyetothekids,andIhatedmyselffor it.Icouldntfacethem;notwithwhatIdjustdone.
Igotinto mycarandhittheroad,thetearsflowingasIcontrolledthesteering.
Ididntevenknowwhereexactlytogo.Butmymajorplan wasfindingsomewhereelsetospendthenight.Thenbymorning,Idbookaflighttoadifferentcountry.Ahumanone.
MaybeIdbeluckyandtheExecutionerswontcometofindme.
Icouldnt tellJaceaboutit.No.Thiswasmy cross.Hedidntdeservetogetpulleddownwithme.
IwasalreadyoutofDarkspireterritorywhenacallcameinfrom astrangenumber.Ipickedthecalland thevoicethatreachedmemademyheartskipabeat.
Lyric!Itsme…ItsPenelope!Shesoundedlikeshewasbeingchased.
Iquicklymovedtothesideoftheroad,bringingthecartoastop.
Penelope?Whatstheproblem?Whereareyou? I dontIcant-Shegrunted,asifshejusttrippedandfellonsomething.
Iheardagunshot,followedbyhershriek.
Myeyesroundedaspanicovertookme.Whatthe hellwashappening? Penelope! Youhavetolistentome,Itsoundedlikeshe wasrunningagain.Buthervoice wasstrainedandweaker.Whatifshehadbeenhurt? Yourkids…theyrealive.Theyare-anothergunshotandthelinewentdead.
Sodidmyheart.
Icouldntblink.Despiteknowingthecallhadended,Iheldthephoneinmyhand,staringattheblankscreen.

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Yourkids.Theyarealive.
Myheartpulsedwithanuneventempo,climbinguptomythroatasiftryingtoescape.
Oh,gods.
LifesurgedbacktomeasIblinkedandtookinthewords.MyhandsshookasIdialedthenumber,butitwouldntconnect.
No,no,no.Please,no,I muttered likeaninsanewoman.
Wherewasshe?Who waschasingher? 138 Iheardaraucousbreathechoingwithinthecar.Ittookmesometimetorealizeitwascomingfromme.Iwas hyperventilating.
Then,itgotworse.
Isawtheheadlightscomingfrombehind.ButIthoughtitmustbeanormalvehicleanddidntgiveanythoughttoit.Butthen,itkeptgettingcloserandclosertome.
Withhowcloggedmymindwas,Irealizedalittletoolatewhattheintentionwas.Thescreamescapedmebeforethevancrashedintome.
Mycarwasviolentlythrustforward,thetiresskiddingbeforeittippedontoitsside,flippingoverlikeaturtlehelplesslystruggling.Inside,Iwasthrownagainsttheseatbelt,mybodyslammingagainst theinterioraschaoseruptedaroundme.
Ididntstopscreaming.
BytheMoon,please.Itcantbe.
Myearswereringingpainfully,myheadconstantlybanging.

Icouldnthearathingortellwhatwashappeningaroundme.Ididntevenrealizewhen mydoorwaspulledopenuntilIfeltapairofhandsdraggingmeroughly.
Igroanedandwhimperedfromhowsoremybodywas.IknewIwasbleeding.Ijustcouldnttellwhere.
Iheardsomeonesobbingbesideme.
No.Itwasme.
Iwassobbingsohard,myshouldersquaked.Butforwhatexactly,Icouldnttell.
Didithavetodowiththemurderattheparty?OrthefactthatIwasabouttodie? OrthefactthatIjustlearnedfromPenelopethatmykidswerealive?Orwhatwasthat?Wasitalie?Atrick? Iwasdyinganyway.Iwasneverfoundtofindout.
Consciousnesswasslippingoutofme.Ifeltmyeyesgoingclose.
Hey,stayawake.Someoneslappedmycheek.
ImanagedtoopenmyeyesjustasIheardlightfootsteps.The manwhohadslappedmestood upasthenewpersontookhisplace,crouchingbeforeme.
Icouldntseehisfaceduetohowblurrymyvision was,butIcouldtell hewassmilingdownatme.
LyricHarper.His handreachedout,touchingmycheek.
Hisvoice…therewassomethingfamiliaraboutit.
Itallbecameclearwhenheadded,Mybrothersmate.