Chapter34 Thane Impacingmyroomsnowrunningmyhandsthroughmyhairmullingoverthetextmessages1passingbetweenmyselfandlittlewolf.Itookherfirstkissfrom.herandshedoesntcare.IfIhadntbeensoselfishandmoreselfcontrolled,shewouldstillhavethatexperience.Anexperienceshedeservedtohavebychoiceandmoresomorepassionately.IcantsayIregretit.Ifeelguilty,butIdefinitelydontregretit.ItsallImthinkingabout.IjustIwouldhavebeenproperwithit.Takenmytime,morethorough,exploratory.Thethoughtcausingmetogethard,whichisnthelpingmethi
nkclearly.Knowingshesnextdoor,throughashareddoornonetheless,sharingthesetextwithmeismakingitverydifficultnottorunthroughthedoorandgiveherabetterfirstkiss.Ineedtorun.Getridofthisfrustration,butIcantpullmyselfaway.Thetextaboutcarryingthekissforevergivesmeadeepgutscratch,butIdontknowwhy.Damnit,I needtoclearmyhead.Withanexhaustivesigh,IdecidetomindlinkCyrus.Heyyouaround?Ineedtogoforarun,clearmyhead.Youwouldasknow,I wasjustgettingreadytoshavemybikiniline.
Meetmeoutback,dumbass.Imindlinkbackandheadoutside.
Alright,butnocomplaints whenyouseemybush.Its beenafew weeks.

Thenightscrispairfeelsgood,itwillbefallsoon.Iheadouttotheforestbehindthepackhouseandstripdown,placingmyclothesnexttoatree.Myshiftisfast,completelyshiftedbeforehittingtheground.Iveyettomeetashifterthatcanpullthatoff.Ronanisquick,standingtoshakeoutisthis,blackcoat.AfewminuteslaterandCyrusgraywolfnow walksupbesideme.Wetakeoffrunningintothewoods.Thewindblowingthrough.ourfur,thesoftfeelofdirtunderourpawsallsensesheightened.Wearetearingthroughthewoods,runningforafewhours.Themoonisup,almostfull.
Youwant totellmewhyyourassisallwounduptonight? Cyrusmind linkswhileourwolvesarerestinginthemoonlight.Iscreweduptoday .
Anenjoyablescrewup,butascrewup.What,youkilledtheassholeinthedungeon? SorryImissedit.No,thatsnotit.Hedidnt talk.Nicetoeg by the way.
His,notyours.Thanks,Iaimtoplease.Cyruschucklesthroughthelink,but thenhewaitsquietly,knowingIamserious.Itriedtolet RonanpullAylas wolf out,butinsteadIkissedher.Itwas short,barelyasecond,buti backedaway .

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Shethen proceedstotell me itwasher firstkiss.Itookthatfromher andshethankedmeforit.Ipracticallyyell,frustrationsettinginagain.So you kissedher,she liked it andnowyourehanging outwith meinsteadofseeing what shelookslikenaked? What , doIneedtogiveyourthetalk ? Shut thehell up Cyrus.Iscrewed up.After everythingthing shes beenthrough,Ido 1/3 Chapter34 this.Itgiveshersomethingtobeconfusedabout,ontopofallhertrauma.Dontevengetmestartedonthat.Alphashavebeentakingandtakingfromher.Idontwanttotake.Firstof
f.youcantcompareyourselftothemorwhattheydiddipshit.Shetoldyoushelikedit.She wouldnthavetoldyouanythingifshewasscaredorconfused.Secondly,shesfineashell.
Perfection.Anyonespendingtimewithherwouldbetempted.ThatstatementearnshimasnarlfromRonan.THIRD,youtwoclearlyhavehaveaconnection.Youvebeenwithher everyday.Shetrustsyou.Shedoesnthaveto,butshedoes.Youdidnthavetostickaroundafterrescuingher.Anyoneofuscouldvequestionedherforyou ,butyouwantedto.Ifyouwerentwithhereveryday,patientwithher,she wouldprobably be huddledupinacornersomewhere,distraughtandarisktoherself,butshes notandthatsbecauseofyou.Andwhathappensif Ifindmyfated mate,mylunaorshefindshermate?T
henwhat?Idontwanttobreakherhearteither.Its alreadybrokenThane.Likeyours.Maybeyoutwohelp eachotherheal.Ifyoufindyourmates,thenyouhaveaseriousconversationbutyouwouldbothbebetterversionsofyourselves foryourmates.OR,she findshermateandyoutearhisthroatoutandclaimherinhisblood.Botharegoodoptions.

IsighandRonanshakesourhead,buthehassomegoodpoints.Takeitdayby dayThane.Shesspentyearsunable toplan fortomorrowanyway.Weriseup,decidingtoheadbacktothepackhouse.ItswellaftermidnightbythetimeIgetbacktomyroomandgetshowered.Igetreadyforbed,exhaustedfromlittlesleepthepastfewweeks.IthrowonsomegraysweatpantsandcrawlintobedwhenIhearafaintgroan.AfewsecondslaterandIhearwhatsoundslikekickingorthumping.RisingupoutofbedIgotothedooradjoingourroomswhenIhearafaintwhimperandfastbreathing.IknowItoldAylahersidewas
locked,butIdidnttellherIhaveamasterkey.Iquicklyrunovertomydresser,grabbingthekeyandgainentrytoAylasbedroom.ConfusionsetsinwhenIseean emptybed,withthebedcoversontheground.IhearanotherwhimperwhenIkneeldowntolookunderthebed,seeinglittlewolfinthethroesofanightmare.Sheswhimperingandkickingherfeetagainsttheunderneathsideofthebed.Kickingquicklyturnstothrashing.
Littlewolf,littlewolf,ssshhhsshh itsme.ItsThane.WakeupAyla.Youresafe.Ineedyoutowakeup.Ivegota holdofhershoulders,agentlebutfirmgrip.Shes nolongerkicking,butstillwhimpering.Littlewolfwakeup.Itsjustanightmare.Youresafe.Sheslowlystartstoblinkhereyesopen,breathinghardassheopensthosebeautifultealeyes.Slightconfusiontakesoverherfaceasshelooksatmeand thenaroundtotheundersideofthebed.Icanbarelygethalfofmyupperbodyunder here,andnowwerepretzeledtogether.
Itsokaylittlewolf.Justanightmare.Hecant getyouanymore.Ireiterate toherandIwatchherbreathingstarttoslow.Shegrabsmywristtothehandholdingontohershoulderandcloseshereyes,takinginalargebreathandlettingitoutslowly.She 2/3 Chapter34 openshereyesandforawhile,wejustlaythere,staringintoeachotherseyes,waitingtoseewhoisgoingtospeakfirst.
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