Chapter 19 Ayla Do you know why they kept you so long and not the others ? That question has me feeling panicked and I think Thane can probably sense my alarm .
Do I tell him ? Do I tell him I am the reason my entire family is dead ? That it is my fault my family was slaughtered in front of me ? That my first shift ruined my entire life ? I stare into his green eyes while he stares back waiting .
If I trust him with this secret , it could destroy his entire pack .
Or , they could sell me off to someone else .
They could kill me just like my family .
I dont think I can do this .
My eyes dart back and forth across his handsome face , attempting to find a way out of answering this question .
Do you know and not want me to know little wolf ? I nod my head no .
and look down at my hands full of shame .
Then dont tell me now .
Tell me later when you trust me more .

He calmly tells me and reaches out to rub his thumb over my hand .
I look up at him and realize I do trust him a little , although I find myself still in denial , waiting for the rug to be pulled out from under me .
Is there anything you would like me to know Ayla ? Is there ? Im not sure what to say , but find myself writing I cant cry down on my note pad .
You cant cry little wolf ? Do you mean that you want to cry , but cant ? Why cant you cry ? I take a moment to write my answer down for him , not sure how he will feel about it , but I feel like he should know for some reason .
The warden likes it when I scream and cry so I stopped doing both .
It was the only thing I had control over .
He reads back to me and looks at me with sadness .
His eyes intermittently flashing gold , telling me Ronan isnt happy with what he read .
Any shifter that needs to bring pain and suffering on someone to get off doesnt deserve his wolf and needs to be put down .
I promise you Ayla , I will kill the warden in my prison and any other shifter that caused you pain and suffering .
You will cry again , but next time you do it will be because you want to and you will be happy when you do it .

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I stare into his eyes and can tell he means what he says , but I pay no attention to the promise .
Promises arent real .
I dont care who is making them .
I can tell he means what he is saying , but I dont think he understands fully my extent of hopelessness that I battle with off and on throughout the day .
Little wolf , would it be alright if I ate supper with you in here tonight ? You can write down any questions you have for me about myself or the pack and I can try my best to answer them for you .
He asks me with a vulnerability he may not show others in his eyes .
The question has me feeling slightly nervous , but eager .
I nod my head yes .
Great .
I will be back later on tonight , lets say 7 ? I will have some food sent up and we can just eat and talk about anything that comes up or I can answer any questions you may have .
He stands up and I do as well .

I only come up to his sternum .
I look up and I see that he is already smiling down at me .
I smile slightly and lower my head as I begin to blush .
Thane leans down with his mouth next to my ear and whispers you can look down all you want little wolf , but i know youre blushing for me .
I immediately dart my eyes up to his , turning redder which causes him to laugh and show me his dimples .
Dont worry little wolf , as white as your skin is it would rather difficult to hide your blush .
I also enjoy seeing it .
He quickly clears his throat .
I mean , in the sense that if you are blushing , then you arent upset , and you not upset makes me happy .
I should be going .
I will be back later .
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