Stalked by my Professor Novel

Chapter 38 As soon as we're out of Rooke's line of sight, I shove Haven away from me. I wasn't about to let her linger back there-fuck knows what he'd have done to her-but I'm not on babysitting duty, either, and right now I have a class to skip, a fat blunt to smoke, and a sixer that needs consuming, pronto. "Kai!" I ignore her, striding down the hall with my skin crawling, shame burning through me like battery acid. The lingering taste of coffee and spearmint gum and him makes me want to scrub my tongue with steel wool. The fact that I recognize his taste has me seconds away from puking.

"Kai!" Haven calls out behind me, but I'm already halfway down the hall, desperate to put as much distance between me and what just happened as possible. I push through a cluster of students, glaring at them when they protest. Need to get away. Need to wash my mouth out. Need to fucking breathe. "God, Kai, stop!" She's faster than I remember. As I reach the stairs, Haven grabs my arm and yanks me into the landing's alcove. I growl at her, but she just plants herself in front of me, hands on her hips, blocking my escape.

I keep my face blank, my breathing shallow, but she's got her panties in a bunch and won't let it go. "What the hell was that?" "The fuck did it look like?" I wipe my mouth with the back of my hand, looking everywhere except at her. "I made sure he won't bother us again." "I felt you," she hisses, blue eyes narrowing. "Both of you." My head snaps up. "Yeah? Bet you liked it, you fucking sl⁠-" "Fuck you!" She shoves me hard enough that my back hits the wall. "Jesus, Haven, I did what I had to do, okay? How about a, 'thank you, Kai,' you ungrateful bi⁠-" Her slap cuts me off.

I turn my head back to face her, fingering the hot handprint on my cheek. "Should try out for the baseball tea⁠-" She tries to slap me again, but I catch her wrist, yank her around, and shove her into the wall. The next class has already begun, but there's still a chance someone might walk past. So I huddle in close, caging her in with my forearms in the shadow of the alcove's bookshelf. The source of thɪs content is f͟i͟n͟d͟n͟o͟v͟e͟l͟.net Her eyes widen, but her jaw clenches a moment later. "Forget what you saw," I hiss. "What you think you felt. It's over, okay?

Just let it go." She glances away as she laughs, the sound sharp and disbelieving. "Let it go? After what just happened? After what he did to me? After what you both did to me?" "Haven, listen to me. You don't know what Rooke is capable of. What he's been doing⁠-" "Are you kidding me?" she snaps. "Of course I do!" "No, you don't understand. He⁠-" "Oh, so now you guys are best buddies or something? That what this is? You two sharing tips on how to fuck with me? Or are you two just plain fucking?" "That's not fair," I snarl, anger flaring hot in my chest.

"I didn't have a fucking choice back there." Her eyes narrow. "I felt your dick, Kai. That wasn't fear making you hard." My face burns. "You don't know what you're talking about." "Don't I?" She tilts her head, eyes suddenly cold and calculating. "Because that kiss sure as fuck⁠-" I grab her throat before I can stop myself. "Shut the fuck up," I hiss. "You have no idea what's going on." She doesn't flinch, doesn't look away. Just glares at me with those fierce blue eyes. Eyes that always saw right through me. "No. I don't," she says. "So why don't you tell me?" The fight drains out of me.

I let go of her throat, running a hand through my hair. But I don't step back. Don't release her. "Rooke's...got something on me." It's not a total lie. But it's not the whole truth either. "What?" she asks, voice softer now. "What does he have on you?" I look away, unable to meet her eyes. "It's complicated." "Uncomplicate it." "I can't." I let out a frustrated growl. "Please, just trust me when I say he won't bother us again." "Oh-ho, trust you, Mr. Bring It On I've Got a Fucking Lifeboat Now?" She chuckles dryly.

"I wouldn't trust you to piss on me if I was on fire!" "Haven-" I reach up to touch her face, but she knocks my hand away and then starts counting on her fingers. "You choked me on the first day of class. Spat on me. Made me blow you in the library. Fingered me against a tree while you choked me, again. Then you held me down for him so he could⁠-" Each accusation hits like a knee to the groin, but I hold her gaze as I cut in with a low, "I didn't⁠-" "Don't you dare say you didn't mean it." Her voice turns to acid. "You did mean it.

Every disgusting, degrading thing you've done to me since I came back. You meant it all." I swallow hard, fighting the urge to wrap my fingers around her throat again, if only so she'll stop fucking talking. She's right. I did mean it. Every single fucking second of it. I couldn't help it. Her sweet sixteen was a fucking disaster, I'll own that. I made a promise I couldn't keep. But the day after I refused to sleep with her, she just up and disappears? Then I get one letter, one measly hateful letter, then she goes and ghosts me for three years.

And I could have forgiven her for all of it...if I hadn't been so madly in love with her my entire fucking life. It's a whole other ball game when you can't sleep because you're wondering where she is. If she's okay. If she's even still alive. ...If it's your fault she's gone, because you made it impossible for her to stay. So, yeah, I guess I should have been happy to see her the first day she strolled into AHC. But it all just came rushing back. The rage. The shame. The fucking guilt. Kai Jordan can't handle his emotions on a good day. I've been reeling ever since she left.

And when I saw her outside Rooke's class that first day, the way her face lit up like none of it had affected her even a little... Game over. Now she's glaring at me like she expects me to put all that shit into words...and I don't even know where to fucking start. "I'm sorry." I clear my throat, try again. "I'm fucking sorry, okay?" She stares at me with open disbelief. "Yeah, and?" I know it's not enough, but Jesus, she could at least fucking acknowledge⁠- "I'm fucking sorry! I was angry at you. I-I fucking hated you.

But I didn't want this." "You didn't want what, Kai?" Her voice is sickly sweet as she arches against me, batting her eyelashes at me like we're goddamn flirting. "Another man to hold me down while you fucked me? Or for me to get raped by our professor while I was unconscious? Which part are you most sorry for exactly?" A muscle in my jaw tics as my hands curl into fists at my sides. "I didn't know that was going to happen," I say, so quietly I'm not sure she can hear me. "Which part, Kai?" she snaps. My arms slide away from the wall, my eyes dropping. "All of it, Heavenly.

Fucking all of it." Her silence forces my gaze up. Slack face. Wide eyes. She heard something in my voice-something I still can't admit, even to myself. I clear my throat again, but I still sound hoarse when I say, "Rooke won't bother us again, because I've got something on him too." "Yeah? Like what?" She tilts her head, trying to look and sound unaffected, but we've known each other for too long. It's been years, but Little Miss Heavenly can still sense when I'm bleeding inside. "I..." I glance around us, but the next class has begun and the halls are almost entirely cleared out.

"I was there." She says nothing for a moment. And Jesus, her silence is so fucking loud. When she speaks, her voice is tight. "Where, Kai?" "Your room. On Tuesday. I...I saw." The words are sticking in my throat like a gassy sip of beer I can't swallow. "Saw what?" she asks carefully. "Everything." I lick my lips. "I...recorded it. That's why he can't touch us anymore. If he so much as looks in our direction⁠-" "Recorded it," she repeats. I have to force myself to make eye contact. Her gaze is unfocused, her lips parted.

Her chest is rising and falling like she just stopped in the middle of a sprint. "You were there, and you recorded it," she says, like she's trying to get the words to make sense. "Yes, but⁠-" "You filmed him raping me." Fuck me, it sounds a thousand times worse out loud than it did in my mind. "Don't you get it? It's our way out of this fucked up⁠-" "You could have stopped him." She blinks, and just like that, her eyes are luminous with unshed tears. "You could have..." she trails off, shaking her head so hard one of those tears spill down her cheek. "I know. And I'm sorry.

I should have⁠-" "You fucking coward." The words shake as they leave her trembling mouth. "Haven, please⁠-" She shoves past me, shoulder knocking against mine. "Fucking coward!" "Where are you going?" "As far away from you as I can!" she yells, heading straight for the exit without looking back. "Will you just listen to me?" I race down the stairs after her, grabbing her arm. "Let go!" She yanks at her arm, but I just tighten my grip. "This is exactly what he wants. We need to stick together, not⁠-" "We don't gotta do fucking nothing," she says, punching me in the side.

When I ignore the jab of pain, she drags her feet like a four-year-old. "Could you just-" I try to lift her off the floor, but she's squirming around too much. The student liaison, Nora, has her back to us, but I swear if she looks in our direction, she'll be on the phone to campus security. Something makes me look over my shoulder. Rooke, satchel in hand and wearing a quizzical smile, is making his way down the stairs after us. Jesus, this feels like a fucking horror movie. Taking a sharp turn, I angle us toward the library.

I can't let Nora spot me manhandling Haven like this, and I don't dare release her with Rooke a few yards away. En route, I try to reason with one very pissed off girl. "Look, I'm not the fucking enemy here⁠-" She glares up at me as I drag her toward the library. "That's exactly what you are, you delusional fucking asshole! Now let. Me. Go!" Haven drops her entire weight, tearing out of my grip, and scrambles up with a such a foul glare directed at me, you'd think I was trying to abduct her. Suppose I was, kind of. "Miss Lee!" We both turn at the voice.

Nora waves at Haven, the bangles on her arm clattering. "Over here, sweetie!" Haven's expression shuts down immediately. She sends a last glare my way, ignoring Nora as she changes direction and speed walks to the restrooms beside the cafeteria. "Haven!" Nora calls again. Haven doesn't even break stride as she ducks into the women's bathroom, the door swinging shut behind her. I hesitate, glancing back at Nora. She's frowning in confusion, and even looks a little peeved. Weird. "I need to speak with you, Mr. Jordan," Rooke's voice sends an icy shudder through my body.

I don't dare look back at him. Fuck. Before I can think twice, I'm moving toward Nora, putting as much distance as possible between myself and Bastian fucking Rooke. Because he wouldn't try anything in front of her...right? "Hey, Nora," I say, forcing a smile as I approach her desk. She gives me a surprised look. "What can I do for you, Mr. Jordan?" "You're looking for Haven?" Nora's lips purse. "That girl's been avoiding me since the start of the semester," she grumps, and then adjusts her glasses like she shouldn't have said anything, glancing away furtively.

"But that's neither here nor there." "Yeah, she's kinda not feeling well." Nora's eyebrows lift. "Oh? That's unfortunate." She glances over my shoulder, and I can feel Rooke's eyes on my back as he passes through the lobby. But he doesn't approach, thank God. She watches him for a moment, and I'm not sure if it's her annoyance with Haven, but she gives him a brief scowl before putting back her usual smile. "You know, maybe you can help," Nora says. I force a grin. "Yes, ma'am." "You said you two knew each other," she says, bobbing her head toward the restrooms. I shake my head.

"I did?" Her eyes narrow. "That's what you told me when you asked for her number." She grabs the two halves of her cardigan, drawing them closed over her wide bosom. "I don't just go around handing out student's contact details to anyone, Mr. Jordan," she says in a lower voice. As if I don't know. Took a handful of candy bars to sweeten the deal. "I thought you meant we were fu-dating." I clear my throat. "We're...friends." "Well I don't know why, but you'd swear what I have is catching, because I cannot get that girl to talk to me." "About what?" Nora blinks at me through her glasses.

"It's her father. I've been trying to get hold of him since the start of the semester, but the number I have must be wrong." Despite everything, my stomach coils uneasily. "You need to speak to her dad?" Nora frowns. "Not me. The dean. The meeting should have been scheduled weeks ago, but I suppose everyone had the same number I did." No shit. Bobby Lee probably doesn't have a phone anymore. Or he's changed his number again to avoid whichever drug dealer he owes money to. Jesus, Haven, what's holding your popsicle stick house together anyway?

Haven comes out of the bathroom, drawing my eyes away from Nora. "Oh, Haven!" Nora's bangles make my ears ring as she waves in Haven's direction. I thump my fist on the counter. "Gotta go. She needs my help with something important. I'll have her call you, okay?" "No, but, Kai, please-" Nora calls after me. Then, as a last resort, comes charging around the reception desk at a surprising speed for an old lady. "Miss Lee!" Haven spots her coming and makes a break for the exit. As in she literally fucking runs.

And I go racing after her, because she's headed straight for Rooke, and he could just scoop her up and toss her in his car, drive her away, and do whatever the fuck he wants to her. Again. I skid out of AHC's front door, spot Haven, and glance up to see Rooke a few yards away. Like the fucking shark he is, he smelled blood in the water. He slows down as he heads for his car, watching her get closer. Her head is down. She hasn't seen him yet as she angles over the parking lot, headed for Greek Row via the shortest route...like she always does.

Never mind the dangers she might pass without realizing. Never fucking realizing. I knew Rooke was trouble. I knew, and I said nothing. I did nothing. What was the point of protecting her all those years ago, only to abandon her when a wolf is circling? Rooke calls out to her, and after a second's hesitation, she veers and storms over to him. I stop in my tracks, because fuck she looks pissed. Good. Let her punch him in the kidneys, see how he likes it. I'm grinning as I strut closer, my eyes flickering between them as she goes off at him.

Whatever she's saying is too low to carry, but from the way he tenses, it's not pleasant. He turns to walk away, disappearing behind the boulder where he usually parks his car. Haven isn't having any of it. She shakes her head, mouth moving a mile a minute as she lunges after him. "That's it, Miss H. Tear him a new one. Fucker deserves it." I angle to the side so I won't miss her chewing him out. Screw punching him in the kidney, I hope she knees him in the groin like she did me on Saturday night. I'm still shocked I wasn't peeing blood after that. Girl kicks like a fucking horse.

Soon as they're in sight again, I stop walking to watch the fireworks. Rooke throws Haven a dogged look, shaking his head, mouth moving as he speaks. Her back to is to me, so I can't see if she replies, but he looks away to laugh, and when he faces her again, she slaps him. Fucking slaps him. His head snaps to the side, a hand lifting but never reaching his face. It curls into a fist and drops to his side instead. Haven's hands are in fists now, too. I can see her body trembling from here, hear a word or two, but nothing that makes sense.

Rooke laughs again, drops his head a little, shakes it. Like he's telling a kid if they behave, they'll get ice cream. His lips move, but I don't know what he says. I wish I did. Then I could say it to her. Because one second she looks ready to claw his eyes out, then she's grabbing his shirt and pulling him down for a kiss. I blink and rub my eyes, because this can't fucking be happening. But sure as fuck, he's kissing her, and she's kissing him. And it's no fucking peck on the cheek. He snatches her hair. She leans into him like her legs have gone lame.

Heat flushes through me, because I can feel their lust all the way across the fucking parking lot. My jaw clenches so tight, my teeth squeak against each other. This can't be real. We were just tag-teaming Rooke's pretentious ass in that lecture hall, now this? I didn't imagine that spark of connection between us when we locked gazes. ...stay the fuck away from me...from us... Christ, I actually thought there was a future for us. Something beyond the spite and resentment.

"You pathetic piece of shit," I mutter to myself, hand ripping through my hair as my brain scrambles to make sense of what my eyes just witnessed. There's no hope. ...we don't gotta do fucking nothing... There's no us. And I can't accept that. I've never been able to accept that. Haven Lee is mine. Mine. And if I can't fucking have her, then no one can. I turn back to the main campus building, walking on automatic, each breath landing with a sharp jab inside my chest. But with every step, calm resolution flows into me. Shock is replaced with something darker, more focused.

I'm glad Haven ripped out my heart and stomped on it. Now there's nothing holding me back. I step into AHC's foyer, my heartbeat slowing as I walk up to the reception desk. "Hey, Nora?" She glances up from her computer monitor, blinking owlishly at me from behind her glasses. "Back already?" "Yeah, turns out Haven didn't need me after all." I try to sound glib, but Jesus those words scorch my chest like desert air. Nora blinks at me expectantly. "And?" ...yeah, and...? "And..." I rest on my forearm, leaning in to smile at her. "I think I can help you after all." The rage hasn't disappeared.

It's simmering below the surface, ready to explode. A smile ghosts across my lips as I head for my next class. I was going to declare a truce with Haven. Let her live her best college princess life while I go about my goddamn business. But to hell with that. This is motherfucking war.