CHAPTER 042 : On The Other Side Of The Door AUTHORSNOTE:AWarningBeforeWeContinue.
The lasttwochaptersmark thebeginningofashift.
Asstatedinthesynopsis,thesecharactersaremorallycomplexandwereabouttostartpeelingbackthelayers.Thingsareabouttogetmessy.Unhinged.Darkerthanbefore.
Everycharacterissteppingintotheirtruestform,fromwhichtheycaneithergrowbetteror worse.
Choiceswillbemade.Lineswillbecrossed.Andnoteveryonewillcomeoutclean.
Ifyoure herefortheride,buckleup.
Youvebeenwarned.
E.S.
*** ~~KNOX~~ *** Yearsofpatrollingenemylinesinthekindofplaceswheremendisappearwithoutatracetaughtmehowtolisten.Reallylisten.Tothecrackofabranchthatmeansyourenotalone.Ican tellthemakeofagunjustfrom theway someonecocksitinthedark.Icancounthowmanypeopleareinaroombytherhythmoftheirbreath.
AndthefaintscuffIjustheardinsideSloanescloset?Thatwasaleatherheeleddressshoe.Officeworn.Male.
Theresonlyonepersonpathetic enough,obsessedenough,andentitledenoughtosneakintoherspaceandhideinthedark.
Idbet myentirefuckingfortuneitsFinn.
Isteptowardtheclosetandpressmyhandagainstthewood.
Hesbreathing.Notloud.Butnottrainedeither.
Icatchthesubtletrace ofcologne,afamiliaronethatconfirmsmysuspicion.
Finn.
FuckingFinn.
Youdthinkhedrevealhimselfnowthathesbeencaught.Thathedstepoutofthedamnclosetandfacemelikeaman.Butnoofcoursenot.Thatwouldrequireaspine.Finnsneverhadoneofthose.
Istareatthesliverofdarknessbetweentheclosetdoors,mypulseloudinmyears.

Everysecondhestayshidden,myangerboilshigher.
ThishasalwaysbeenFinn.Sincewewerekids.Alwaysneedingtohavethebetterthingsforhimself,evenwhenhedoesnttrulywantthem.Hedbeg,borrow,stealandliethroughhisperfectteethifit meanthecouldhavemore.Iletitgoeverytime.Toldmyselfitwasntworththefight.
ButthentherewasLydia.
Myjawticks.
Ourlittlesister.
Iveneverforgivenhimforthat.
Iforcethethoughtaway.Icantgothere.
Notrightnow.IfIdo,Illhaveto thinkaboutotherthingstoo.Enlisting.Deployment.Bloodinsand.Screamsinthejungle.Ghostsinthemirror.Scars.
Ishouldopenthatdoor.Shouldriphimoutoftherebythecollar,slamhimagainstthewall,andmakesureheneverbreathesSloanesnameagain.
ButifItouchhimrightnow,ifIsomuchaslayafingeronhim- IdontknowwhatIlldo.
Therageisthatloud.Thatthick.
Successfullyunlocked! Icanalreadyimaginemyhandsclosingaroundhisthroat,seetheWhithbfhiseyeswhenherealizesImnotjoking anymore.
Then- Avoice.Soft.Likearopepullingmeoutofthestorm.
CHAPTER042:OnTheOtherSideOfTheDoor Knox? Iturn.
Sloane.
Whats theproblem?sheasks.
Shesstillonherknees.Handsraised,cuffed.Hair hangingoverhershoulders.Thewaysheslookingatmepuncheseverythoughtcleanoutofmyhead.Shessoperfect.
Thecloset,Isay.Wonderfulwoodwork.
Shesmiles.Itwasagiftfrommygrandmother.Inheryoungeryears,shewaskindofaprofessionaldivorcee.Soshesloaded.

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Awhat? Youknow.Marryarichguy,makesurehesinloveenoughtoskiptheprenuporsignagenerous one.Shesbeenmarriedfivetimes.
Soundslikealotofwork.
Iagree.
Ismirk.Youdidntthinktojointhefamilybusiness?Oristhatwhatyouredoingrightnow ? Tryingtogetmetofallinloveandskipaprenup? Fuckyou,Knox.
IgrinasImovetowardher,handreaching forherface,thumbbrushing hercheek.Hereyesgosoftagain,herbodyleaningintothetouch.
Oh,Bunny.Iwillfuckyou,thatsforsure.Illtakeyousohard,youllprobablyhavetocallinsicktomorrow.
Sheshuddersbeneathmyhand,eyesgoingdarkwithneed.
Please,shewhispers.
Pleasewhat,angel? Takeme.
Behindme,Ihearthenoiseagainthetiniestshift,thecatchofbreath,maybeeventhebrushofakneeagainstwoodbutIdontacknowledgeit.
Icould.
Icouldwalkoverthererightnow,ripthatdooroffits hinges,andendwhateverpitifulillusionFinnsclingingto.ButIdont.Notyet.
BecauseImlettingthatdarkerpartofmerisetheoneIkeepcagedbeneathcharmandcontrol,theoneforgedinheatandbloodandloss.Thepartthatdoesntbelieveinmercy.
Rightnow,thatpartwantstomarkwhatsmine.
Rightnow,thatpartwantsFinntoseeithappen.
Lethimsitthereinthedarkandlistentothesoundsshemakesforme.Lethimrealizehelostbeforeheevensteppedontothebattlefield.
Shesnothis.Notanymore.Maybenotever.
Lethimcryaboutit.Lethimspiral.Lethimcrumblebeneaththeweightofthattruth.
Butmostofall? Lethimknowthatthisspacethiswoman,thislifeismine now.

Andtheresnoroominitforbothofus.
Iunfastenmypants,lettingthemdroptothefloor.Hereyesfollowthemovement.SheswatchingmelikeImsomethingholy.WhenIslideoffmyboxers,hergazetravelsupward,lingeringonthelengthofme,rightwhereImalreadyhardforher.Herstareonlymakesitworse.
AndthenIdosomethingIhaventdoneinalongtimenotinfrontofanyone.
Ireachforthehemofmyshirt.
Pullitovermyheadinoneswiftmotion.
Exposeallofit.
Forabeat,Ijuststandthere.Her eyeswiden,draggingslowlyoverthetattooscarvedacrossmychest,my ribs, myarms.
Hermouthparts.Thatsalotoftattoos.
2/2 CHAPTER042:OnTheOtherSideOfTheDoorDoyouhatethem? No.Ijust…wishIcouldtouchthem.
No.
Shecant.
Thetattoostheylookgood.Thatsthepoint.Years ofcarefulplanning,hoursundertheneedle,makingsuretheywerebeautifullyarranged,eachoneflowingintothenext.Ispentafortunemakingthemlooklikeart.
Buttheyrenotjustink.
Theyrecoverups.
Becauseifshetouchesthemreallytouchesthemshellfeelwhatsunderneath.Thescars.Theonesthatdontsitflushwiththeskin.Theonestheartistshadtoworkaround,blendintoshadows,hidebeneathshadingandlines.
AndIcanthavethat.
Notnow.Maybe notever.
Becausethosescars…theycomewithstories.StoriesIllnevertell.
Getonyourfeet,Isay.Iwanttokissyou.