CHAPTER012:ThisIsWhatYouWanted Ofcourseihavetothinkabouthim,Isay,moretomyselfthanKnox.Itswhatanynormalpersonwouldde 1hastilyadjustmyglasses,theframesaskewfromourpassionate,mindblowing,andrecklessescapadeMyfingerstrembleastheypushthelensesupthebridgeofmynoseImacutelyawareofthemascarastreakingdownmycheeks,paintingmeastheverypictureofpostcoitaldisarray.Irakemyhandsthroughmyhair,attemptingtofamethewildstrands,andsmoothdownmydress.
Inthemirrorsreflection,Knoxwatchesme.Hisexpressionisunreadable.Hisdarkeyestrackmyeverymovement,andeventhoughItrynottolookathimdirectly,Icanfeeltheheatofhisstare.
Yourpostnutclarityisannoying,hesays.Ifeelusedrightnow,Kitten.
Thenyouvegotitbetter.Ifeelstupid Iturnaroundtofinallyfacehim,andhiseyeszeroinonme.
Becauseyoufuckedmeandlikedit?heasks.
Iavertmyeyes,shamecurlinginmygut.Ivejusthadsexwithamanwhom Ihaventevenseennaked.Inapublicrestroom,noless.Whatthehelliswrongwithme?IstealaglanceatKnox,hesalreadyadjustedhisclothes,everyinchthecomposeddevil,notahintofourtrystvisible.Notevenapeek.
Wehadawonderfultime,Knox,Isay,forcingthewordspastthelumpinmythroat.Butthiscanthappenagain.Finncantfindoutaboutthis.

Heremainssilent,hiseyesneverleavingmine.Insomeweird way,Ithinkhestryingnottosmile.Thecornersofhismouthtwitch.
Dowehaveadeal,Knox?Ipress,desperationseepingintomytone.
Gobacktoyourfriend,Kitten.Hemustbemissinghislittlepet.
Ihavenoretort,nowittycomeback.Justagnawing guiltthatthreatenstoconsumeme.Iturnonmyheel,fumblingwiththelockbeforewrenchingthedooropen.
Apetitewomanstandsinthedoorway,armscrossedtightbeneathacleavagebaringcorset.Herfoottapsimpatientlyonthe floor.Shesgotpiercingseverywhereeyebrow,nose,lip,andashinysilverstudglintingfromthedipofhercollarbone.Shesglaringatme.
So youwereinthereallthistime?shesnaps.
Sorry,Imumble,attempting tosidestepherwrath.
Hereyes move overmyshoulder,wideningasshetakesin whatIassumemustbeKnox.Damn.Wereyouintherescrewingthat? Heatfloodsmyface.Withoutanotherword,Ibolt,runningdownthehallway,weavingthroughthethrummingclub,thebassreverberatinginmychestlikeasecondheartbeat.Ineed toget backtoFinn,tonormalcy,toanythingbutthisspiralingdisaster.

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Ifindhimaloneatourbooth,thelapdancer mercifully gone.Hecradleshisbourbon,andmydrinkwaitsbesidehim.AsIapproach,heknitshisbrow,concernetchinglinesacrosshis face.
IwaswonderingifIneededtogetsecurityorsomething,hesays,eyesscanningme.Whathappened? Iforcealaugh.Longlineinthe restroom.Youknowhowitis;womenandtheirbladders.
Isitbesidehim,tappingnervouslyonmylapandturningtosmileathim.
Buthiseyeshavemovedpastme.Theyresomewhereelse,narrowed.IfollowhislineofsighttoseeKnoxsaunteringbacktotheVIPsection,raisinghisglassinamocksalutetowardFinn.
Whatwereyoudoingintherestroom,Sloane?Finnsvoiceislow.
Peeing.WhatelsewouldIbedoing? Heturnstomefullynow.Wasmybrotherthere? Comeon.Therestroomsherearelabeled.
Youredeflecting.Answerthequestion.
WhatdoyoumeanImdeflecting?Myheartrawell;Imaterribleliar.

cagelikeacagedanimal.Finnknowsmetoo Successfullyunlocked! Hiseyesnarrowfurther.Didhetouchyou? Finn… Did youfuckhim? 1/2 theservingsetisstayawayfromth MeaningtiendannishisskinConte Bienamigosacangearsoonallstepdosen,Bouncersappear Theymomwithmilitaryprecision,grabbingFinnmidstrideonehocksanarmaroundhischest, theothercatcheshimbytheebrowfastingjustenoughto pinhimwithoutcausingtoomuchdamage Geofmehesays,tryingtojerkfree,butitsnouse.Theyretrainedforthisbuiltforit.MuscleslikestoreFaceslike Eneofth
emleansinclose.Sir,youneedtoleave.Now FinnseyesarestilllockedonKnox.Takeyourhandsoffme.Imleavinganyway? Butbesnotgoinganywhere.Notreally.Hesstillstraining,stillreadytolaunchhimselfagainif givenaninch.
AndKnow?Thatbastardjustloungesinhisseatlikeaprincewatchingastreetfight.Onearmrestinglazilyonthebooth,bloodmakingfromthecornerofhissmirkingmouth.
Lethimgo,pleaseLeayvoicesmall.Itakehimhome.
DontHeturnstome,eyesablaze.Isthiswhatyoumeantwhenyousaidyouwantedtoexploreimmorality?Sluttingaftermybrotherandscrewinghiminapublicrestroom?Well,congratulations,honey.Youcantgetanymoreimmoralthan that Arewecoolhere,sir?oneofthebouncerssays.Dowehavetodragyouout? Great Theyloosentheirhold,andheshakeshimselffree,spinningonhisheeland stalkingtowardtheext FinnIcall,movingtofollow,butanarmsnakesaroundmywaist,haltingme.Knox.
Lethimgohemurmursintomyear.Hesmadehispoint.
Tearsprickatmyeyes,blurring myvision.IshoveawayfromKnox,turningtofacehim,angerandshamewarringwithinme.
Thisiswhatyouwanted,wasntit?Isay,voice