Bonds at War: The Virgin is Mine Novel

Chapter 200 Damn You Chapter 200 Damn You ROWAN Since when have I had a good night's sleep like this ? Probably never . +10 Free Coins Not once in all the years I could remember . My nights had always been poisoned restless , haunted , full of shadows that stayed with me even when my eyes were closed . When I was younger , it was the nightmares of comparison . I felt like I was never enough . Sometimes , I wondered what it would feel like if Elijah was gone . However , the day he actually died , the nightmares grew even more monstrous . I missed him so much that I wanted it to be me instead .

When I met Ellana , the nights shifted . They were filled with a different fear - the gnawing doubt that she would leave and that she never truly loved me . I would lie awake next to her , looking at her , wondering if she was already planning her escape . And when Tessa left me , there was no comparison . It was her image that tormented me . Her laughter and her voice - and then her silence , her absence , like a thorn lodged deep into my chest . That was the cruelest nightmare of them all . But last night was different .

For the first time in what felt like an eternity , I slept without the weight of ghosts pressing on my chest . I had no fear , no cold dread waiting for me in the dark . Just warmth . Just her . Because I had just made love to Tessa . The thought alone made my chest flutter . It had been her - every sound , every touch , every kiss . It wasn't a dream nor a trick of the mind . I missed her so much , and now I couldn't wait . I had her again . She came back . My mate came back .

I reached out instinctively , my hand sliding across the sheets , eager to feel her skin and pull her back into my arms . However , all I touched was the cool , empty space beside me . My hand froze . My heart did too . 1/4 11:29 Mon , 1 Septti . Chapter 200 Damn You No. +10 Free Coins I blinked my eyes open , my body jerking upright as I sat on the edge of the bed . The sheets were tangled and cold . The scent of her still clung to the air , but she wasn't there . " Tessa ? " I called softly , my voice cracking in the quiet . No answer .

I looked around the place , the bare house , each shadowy corner , each room that should've held her . My footsteps echoed as I moved from one to another , desperate , searching for any trace . But there was nothing . No note on the table . No letter by the bed . No sign that she had even planned on staying . " Damn it , " I whispered , and then the curse slipped harsher through my teeth . " Damn it ! " Did I just let her go again ? The thought sent me spiraling , my fists tightening . How could I have been so careless ?

How could I let my guard down even for a second , thinking she would stay ? How would I even know where she is now ? I never asked where she lived now , or if she had a new number , a new life , anything that could tie me to her , I was so drunk on having her again and feeling her close , that I never stopped to think . I hit myself , my palm slamining against my forehead . How could I let my mate / run away from me twice ? *** TESSA 2/4 11:29 Mon , Chapter 200 Damn You They were all looking at me on the public boat .

+10 Free Coins I pretended not to notice , keeping my gaze on the wooden floorboards beneath my feet , as though staring at the cracks of the old vessel could erase every single pair of eyes burning holes into me . The morning air was crisp , the sea mist clinging to my clothes , but my palms were already damp . Maybe it was because I boarded right on time for the first dawn boat - one of those half - forgotten rides only people who absolutely had to travel this early bothered to take . That was my salvation . If I had waited even half an hour longer , Rowan might have caught me .

My phone buzzed in my pocket . I dug it out and found a string of messages from Noelle . " You must have enjoyed too much , " she'd written at two in the morning . " You texted Edith you were staying in Fenra until morning . Are you serious ? Did you meet with Rowan ? " I shut my eyes and shook my head . Noelle knew about Rowan because she was my ranting buddy . However , I slightly regretted it now . She pestered for me to show her a photo , and when I did , she told me to " fuck him " once because he was too " irresistible . " Well , good news to Noelle - I did just that last night .

However , I escaped like a thief right after . Fortunately, Rowan had been fast asleep . He looked peaceful . And for him , that was rare . It seemed he needed it . It was the only mercy I could give him - let him rest , let him wake up to an empty bed and not the sound of me leaving . I pressed my lips together and adjusted the coat around me . His coat . I had grabbed some of his clothes on the way out , wearing them over my body . They were definitely too big and smelled too much like him , but I had no other choice .

Now here I was , tucked between strangers on a rickety boat bound for Ylarc , with multiple stopping points along the way . That was the last time . 3/4 11:29 Mon , 1 Sept Chapter 200 Damn You The last time I was ever going to let myself fall into him like that . 28 % +10 Free Coins My body was still sore from what we did . Every shift , every small movement , reminded me of the night we shared , of how his hands knew me better than I wanted them to and how I had begged despite swearing I never would again . Damn him . Damn Rowan Wrenmoor and his big dick .

My face heated , my teeth gritted , and I curled tighter into myself . The sway of the boat didn't help - it only rocked the memories loose again . While I was cursing him inside my head , a shadow fell across my lap . I looked up , startled , and saw an old woman balancing two tin cups of steaming coffee . She wore a faded scarf around her head , her wrinkled hands surprisingly steady despite the boat's uneven sway . " You must have had a good time yesterday , young woman , " she said kindly , pressing one cup into my hands . I looked at her , confused . Her eyes twinkled with mischief .

And then I followed her gaze . My brows furrowed . Her eyes weren't looking at my face . They were looking lower at my neck . Slowly , I tugged the collar of Rowan's coat away and glanced down at myself . My heart plummeted . I was bruised. Bruised and marked , with angry - red trails of teeth and lips scattered all over my skin . My mouth opened in silent horror . The cup trembled in my grip , scalding - hot liquid sloshing dangerously close to the rim . I clutched the coffee tighter , not minding the burn Really . Damn you , Rowan Wrenmoor