Chapter 21 % What does that mean ? I asked , my voice heavy as I hurled the question .
After an hour of blood extraction for Lordes transfusion , I was now left inside a resting quarters to recover .
it was just Lucian and me .
I hadnt spoken since the doctor called me Lordes biological mother , never questioning Lucian during the silence , until now .
Why did you put my name there ? I repeated .
Why not … Chesca ? Shes the real mother .
Yes , I raised him , but it was Chesca who gave birth to him , wasnt it ? Lucian took a deep breath and covered his face with one hand , clearly wanting to answer but unsure how .
I watched his expression , every movement showing the turmoil in his mind .
Lucian , Ill listen .
Ill try to understand , I muttered , my voice cold .
Whose child … is Lorde ? }} Is he really Chescas ? Or mine ? I couldnt understand why Lucian would claim me as the biological mother .
I traced the scar on my stomach .
My stepmother said it was from the accident , and I believed her .
But when Lorde saw it , he went berserk , accusing me of knowing it was from an operation , from giving birth .
Chesca … Lucian finally spoke .
Hers ? I couldnt help the tremble in my voice as my mind raced with confusion .
When I first saw Lorde , I felt warmth and wanted to keep him loved .
I thought it was because Chesca had been a good sister to me , but was that really the only reason ? Chesca was so understanding … } Of what ? I hissed .
Just tell me ! Is Lorde her son or mine- } Ours ! he suddenly snapped and stood up , frustration pouring out of him .

He looked at me with tearful , guilty eyes , his shoulders heaving as he fought to control his emotions .
She died sending you to the hospital because I begged her , his voice broke .
My lips parted in shock .
She … blindly accepted everything because she couldnt bear a child .
So you planted it in me ?! Did we … did we cheat on her ? I asked , my tears flowing at the disgusting thought .
God forbid , I never imagined Id commit such a lowly act .
Chesca was nothing but a good sister to me , yet I bore her husbands child .
Did that mean I seduced Lucian ? That we had an affair ? No … No , Hestia .
Were both drunk .
On our anniversary , you got drunk , Chescas sick .
I lost my mind .
I didnt know it was you until next morning and you didnt know it was me .
} I saw him swallow hard , fighting the emotion rising in him .
He was strong , trying to hold it together , but I couldnt .
I couldnt stop crying .
I ripped the IV from my arm and stood up , making Lucian panic .
Dont move yet ! he hissed .
I couldnt be distracted .
When he approached , my palm hit his cheek .

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The shock on his face was clear .
I slapped him again , memories of Chesca flooding my mind .
She was so happy on her wedding day .
My memory may be fragmented , but I remember how proud and content she was to marry him , only to later find out he had impregnated another woman .
Not just anyone but me .
Her sister .
Why me ?! I screamed in hatred .
How dare you ! } Im sorry … he choked out .
He let me slap him again and again until my fists landed against his chest .
One drunken night … the next day , you had no memory of it .
When you found out you were carrying Lorde , y you tried to end your life , Hes … I gasped at another revelation .
My knees weakened until I collapsed onto the floor .
My mind couldnt accept that Lorde was mine , born from betrayal .
Even if it was because of drunkenness , even if it was an accident , it was still a grave sin against my sister .
I later learned it was you .
I was afraid to admit it to you .
You were scared to raise a child without knowing the father .
I planned to tell you , but Chesca … she said if shed forgave me and accepted the child , wed adopt the baby .
You wouldnt have to worry about anything , Hestia .

As long as I wont tell you .
You betrayed my sister … and now me ? I cried , my voice cracking .
Lucian tried to touch me , but I pushed him away in anger .
Mommy knows , doesnt she ? Lucian , defeated , nodded and lowered his head in shame .
Maybe the shame and guilt had not yet fully consumed him .
He didnt know what happened that night .
Neither did I.
But being drunk was no excuse .
Would I have forgiven Lucian if he and Beverly slept together drunk ? No.
Especially if it involved my sister .
Even if Chesca had accepted it , even if she tried to move on , it didnt erase the pain .
It didnt undo the fact that her heart had been crushed , that Lucian and I had trampled over her dignity , her womanhood , even if it wasnt intentional .
Could it be … the accident ? Did Chesca try to end everything that night ? With me ?! The night of the accident … I couldnt finish .
The weight of it all strangled my words .
But Lucian did .
You were about to give birth to Lorde , he said weakly .
Chesca was taking you to the hospital … when the accident happened .
His answer shattered my world completely .
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